Hey there, comedy lovers! I’ve got some seriously clever quips in store for you. And if you’re a fan of Washington State, this is your lucky day. As an avid explorer of the Evergreen State myself, I can assure you that there are plenty of rib-tickling jokes to be had about this stunning slice of heaven on earth.
So why not take a load off and kick back while we dive headfirst into 75 knee-slappingly funny jokes about Washington? Get ready to laugh until your sides hurt – this is going to be one wild ride!
List of Jokes About Washington
1. Why did the baseball team in Washington always carry an umbrella? Because they knew they had a lot of rain delays!
2. What do you call a politician who can juggle? A Washington “spin” doctor!
3. Why did the tomato turn red when it visited Washington? Because it saw the Capitol and got embarrassed!
4. How did the Washington football team change a lightbulb? They just traded it for a younger, more promising lightbulb!
5. Why was the math book sad when it went to Washington? Because it had too many “poli-tricks”!
6. What do you call a dog that works at the White House? The “paw-litical” advisor!
7. Why don’t vampires visit Washington? Because they can’t find any necks of state!
8. How did George Washington chop down cherry trees? With his “hatchet” skills!
9. Why did the scarecrow get elected as mayor in Washington? Because he was outstanding in his field!
10. What do you call a ghost that haunts the Washington Monument? The “spook-tator”!
11. Why did the computer go to Washington? Because it wanted to meet the byte house!
12. What do you call a Washingtonian who can speak multiple languages? A “polyglotician”!
13. Why did the Washington chef make a bad omelet? Because they couldn’t stop flipping-flopping!
14. What’s the favorite snack of politicians in Washington? Pork-barrel chips!
15. Why did the music conductor in Washington get arrested? Because they were caught conducting a “lobby-phony”!
16. What did the Washington weather say to the comedian? “You’re really bringing the “sun-shine” today!”
17. Why did the scarecrow move to Washington? Because he wanted to be a part of the “straw-nion”!
18. What do you call a magician from Washington? A “congressman-tician”!
19. Why did the clock go to Washington? Because it heard there were plenty of “second hands”!
20. What do you call a marathon runner in Washington? A “politician” – they’re always running for something!
21. Why did the Washington baseball team go to therapy? Because they had trouble catching any “breaks”!
22. What’s the favorite snack of politicians in Washington? Gerrymander-ade!
23. Why did the Washingtonian bring a ladder to the bar? Because they heard the drinks were on the house!
24. What’s the favorite dance move of politicians in Washington? The “flip-flop”!
25. Why did the politician in Washington buy a ladder? Because they wanted to “climb the polls”!
26. What do you call a group of politicians in Washington stuck in a room together? A “bureaucracy”!
27. Why did the Washington musician refuse to play “The Star-Spangled Banner”? Because they were tired of all the “sharp” remarks!
28. How did the Washingtonian fix their computer? They turned it “off and on-Congress”!
29. What did the sign outside the Washington bakery say? “We knead your votes!”
30. Why did the Washingtonian become an artist? Because they wanted to paint the town red (and blue)!
31. What do you call a Washington politician who can play the guitar? A “strum-pet”!
32. Why did the Washington gardener get a promotion? Because they had excellent “lobby-cropping” skills!
33. What did the Washingtonian say to their friend at the baseball game? “I’m rooting for the home plate!”
34. Why did the Washingtonian bring a ladder to the theater? Because they wanted to “climb the drama-tic arts”!
35. What do you call a Washingtonian who can speak in rhyme? A “politician-poet”!
36. Why did the Washington politician become a comedian? Because they were tired of being the “butt” of everyone’s jokes!
37. What’s the favorite movie genre of politicians in Washington? Political “thrillers”!
38. Why did the Washington basketball team hire a farmer? Because they needed someone with good “court-plowing” skills!
39. What did the Washingtonian say to their friend at the art museum? “This place is really “picture-perfect”!”
40. Why did the Washingtonian bring a ladder to the grocery store? Because they wanted to “reach for the cabinet positions”!
41. What do you call a Washingtonian who can balance a budget? A “fiscal-athlete”!
42. Why did the Washingtonian start a bakery? Because they wanted to “rise” to the occasion!
43. What did the Washingtonian say to their friend at the football game? “I’m rooting for the “ball-ance”!”
44. Why did the Washingtonian bring a ladder to the park? Because they wanted to “reach for the sky-lines”!
45. What do you call a Washingtonian who can solve puzzles? A “political enigma”!
46. Why did the Washington chef always carry a scale? Because they wanted to weigh in on every issue!
47. What did the Washingtonian say to their friend at the theater? “This play is really “congress-ive”!”
48. Why did the Washingtonian bring a ladder to the library? Because they wanted to “climb the ranks of knowledge”!
49. What do you call a Washingtonian who can jump high? A “political high-flier”!
50. Why did the Washingtonian start a flower shop? Because they wanted to “blossom” in the community!
51. What did the Washingtonian say to their friend at the hockey game? “I’m rooting for the “puck-eration”!”
52. Why did the Washingtonian bring a ladder to the beach? Because they wanted to “climb the tides of popularity”!
53. What do you call a Washingtonian who can write speeches? A “rhetoric-aide”!
54. Why did the Washington barber always carry a mirror? Because they wanted to reflect on the state of the nation!
55. What did the Washingtonian say to their friend at the concert? “This performance is really “senate-sational”!”
56. Why did the Washingtonian bring a ladder to the office? Because they wanted to “climb the corporate ballot”!
57. What do you call a Washingtonian who can navigate through bureaucracy? A “paperwork-ninja”!
58. Why did the Washington painter only use primary colors? Because they wanted to appeal to a broad “base”!
59. What did the Washingtonian say to their friend at the museum? “This exhibit is really “govern-mental”!”
60. Why did the Washingtonian bring a ladder to the concert? Because they wanted to “reach new musical heights”!
61. What do you call a Washingtonian who can balance the budget and cook? A “culinary economist”!
62. Why did the Washingtonian start a pet grooming salon? Because they wanted to “pamper the political pets”!
63. What did the Washingtonian say to their friend at the opera? “This performance is really “opera-tive”!”
64. Why did the Washingtonian bring a ladder to the stadium? Because they wanted to “climb the ranks of sports”!
65. What do you call a Washingtonian who can solve complex problems? A “legislative genius”!
66. Why did the Washington carpenter always carry a level? Because they wanted to ensure “fair and balanced” construction!
67. What did the Washingtonian say to their friend at the circus? “This show is really “elephant-astic”!”
68. Why did the Washingtonian bring a ladder to the zoo? Because they wanted to “rise to the occasion” and see the giraffes!
69. What do you call a Washingtonian who can negotiate with aliens? A “diplomatic extraterrestrial relations expert”!
70. Why did the Washington tailor always carry a measuring tape? Because they wanted to tailor their policies to fit everyone!
71. What did the Washingtonian say to their friend at the comedy show? “This comedian is really “campaign-tastic”!”
72. Why did the Washingtonian bring a ladder to the party? Because they wanted to “climb the social ladder”!
73. What do you call a Washingtonian who can debate like a pro? A “verbal heavyweight”!
74. Why did the Washington chef always carry a whisk? Because they wanted to whip up some bipartisan desserts!
75. What did the Washingtonian say to their friend at the fashion show? “This collection is really “legisla-chic”!”
