If you’re feeling down and in need of a good chuckle, boy do I have something for you! Have you ever found yourself stuck in traffic with nothing to do but count the minutes until you reach your destination? I’ve got just the thing to keep those boring moments at bay. I’ve scoured every nook and cranny of the internet to gather 75 side-splitting jokes about driving that are sure to tickle your funny bone!
List of Jokes About Driving
1. Why did the car go to the dentist? Because it had a lot of “fillings”!
2. What do you call a dinosaur that crashed its car? Tyrannosaurus wrecks!
3. Why did the scarecrow become a great driver? Because he was outstanding in his field!
4. How do you make a tissue dance while driving? You put a little “boogie” in it!
5. Why did the bicycle fall over while driving? Because it was two-tired!
6. What do you get if you cross a car with a skunk? Roadkill perfume!
7. Why did the traffic light turn red? Because it saw the car coming!
8. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants while driving? In case he got a hole in one!
9. What kind of car does a cow drive? A “moo”-stang!
10. What did the stoplight say to the car? Don’t look, I’m about to change!
11. What do you call a dog that can drive a car? A “wheelie” good driver!
12. Why did the tomato turn red while driving? Because it saw the salad dressing!
13. How do you know if a car is tired? It starts yawning!
14. Why did the bicycle fall asleep while driving? Because it was two-tired!
15. What’s the best way to communicate with a fish while driving? Drop it a line!
16. Why did the chicken cross the road while driving a car? To prove it wasn’t chicken!
17. What did the traffic light say to the car? Don’t look, I’m about to change!
18. Why don’t cars like backseat drivers? Because they’re always “steering” them wrong!
19. Why did the car bring a jacket while driving? Because it had a “soft-top”!
20. What did the cop say to the speeding car? Pull over, I need your autograph!
21. How do you make a car sound like a motorcycle while driving? Put a “vroom” box in it!
22. What do you call a car that’s full of cats while driving? A “purr”-mobile!
23. Why did the car’s engine start a band while driving? Because it had a lot of “piston” rhythm!
24. What do you call a dog driving a steamroller? A “pavement” pounder!
25. Why did the car bring a ladder while driving? It wanted to reach the “highway”!
26. How do you make a car happy while driving? Give it a “tune” up!
27. What did one car say to the other car while driving? I “auto”-know you!
28. Why did the car’s tires get married while driving? Because they wanted to “tyre” the knot!
29. What’s a car’s favorite TV show while driving? Wheel of Fortune!
30. Why did the car win the race while driving? It “auto”-matically knew the way!
31. How do you catch a squirrel while driving? Climb a tree and make car noises!
32. What’s the biggest ant in the world while driving? An eleph-ant!
33. Why don’t cars like playing cards while driving? Because they’re always “crashing” the game!
34. What’s a car’s favorite type of music while driving? Heavy metal!
35. Why did the car’s engine go to the doctor while driving? Because it had a case of “exhaust”ion!
36. How do you make a car sound like a sheep while driving? Put wool in its muffler!
37. What’s a car’s favorite song while driving? “Highway to Hell” by AC/DC!
38. Why did the car go to the dentist while driving? It had a bad case of “grill”!
39. How do you make a car stop while driving? Take away its credit card!
40. Why did the car’s headlights get in trouble while driving? They were “bulb”-ing too much!
41. What do you call a car that’s been through the snow while driving? A “chill”ed car!
42. Why did the car go to the concert while driving? It wanted to “jam” with the music!
43. How do you know if a car is a good singer while driving? It “tires” out its horn!
44. Why did the car’s tires get a divorce while driving? They couldn’t “rotate” anymore!
45. What’s a car’s favorite type of exercise while driving? Pump-ing iron!
46. Why did the car go to the movies while driving? It wanted to “park” itself in front of the screen!
47. How do you make a car sound like a frog while driving? Put it in “neutral”!
48. What’s a car’s favorite type of sandwich while driving? A “wrap”!
49. Why did the car’s brakes go to therapy while driving? They had “stopping” issues!
50. What do you call a car that’s been on a diet while driving? A “slim”-mobile!
51. Why did the car’s engine become a stand-up comedian while driving? It had a lot of “puns” under the hood!
52. How do you make a car sound like a lion while driving? Put a “roar” in its engine!
53. What’s a car’s favorite type of coffee while driving? A “car”-pucchino!
54. Why did the car bring an umbrella while driving? In case it “rained” on the road!
55. How do you make a car sound like a bee while driving? Put “buzz” in its exhaust!
56. What do you call a car with no wheels while driving? Unemployed!
57. Why did the car’s tires throw a party while driving? They were “rolling” out the fun!
58. How do you make a car sound like a cow while driving? Put “moo”sic in its stereo!
59. What do you call a car that’s obsessed with fitness while driving? A “cardio”mobile!
60. Why did the car get a ticket while driving? It couldn’t “break” the speed limit!
61. How do you make a car sound like a helicopter while driving? Put a fan on its roof!
62. What’s a car’s favorite type of dessert while driving? Donuts!
63. Why did the car’s windshield go on strike while driving? It couldn’t see eye to eye with the wipers!
64. How do you make a car sound like a bird while driving? Give it “tweet”ment!
65. What do you call a car that tells jokes while driving? A “carmedian”!
66. Why did the car become a musician while driving? It had perfect “pitch”!
67. How do you make a car sound like a cat while driving? Put a purr engine in it!
68. What’s a car’s favorite type of dance while driving? The brake dance!
69. Why did the car’s radio go to the doctor while driving? It had a case of “static” throat!
70. How do you make a car sound like a snake while driving? Let the tires “hiss” on the road!
71. What do you call a car that’s always sick while driving? An “ill”mobile!
72. Why did the car’s tires go to the spa while driving? They needed a “tread”ment!
73. How do you make a car sound like a trumpet while driving? Give it a “honk” horn!
74. What’s a car’s favorite type of weather while driving? Convertible!
75. Why did the car’s steering wheel go to the gym while driving? It wanted to get “toned”!
